26 February 2014

Quotes from "The Crimson Horror"

Madame Vastra: According to my research, Sweetville's proprietor holds recruitment trials for her little community. She's only interested in the fittest and the most beautiful.
Strax: You may rely on me, ma'am.
Madame Vastra: I was in fact speaking to Jenny.
Strax: Jenny? If this weak and fleshy boy is to represent us, I strongly advise the issuing of scissor grenades, limbo vapor, and triple-blast brain splitters.
Madame Vastra: What for?
Strax: Just generally. Remember, we are going... to the North.

Madame Vastra: If our stratagem succeeds, Jenny will infiltrate deep into the black heart of this curious place.
Strax: And how will she locate the Doctor?
Madame Vastra: To find him she needs only ignore all keep out signs, go through every locked door, and run towards any form of danger that presents itself.
Strax: Business as usual, then?
Madame Vastra: Business as usual.

Madame Vastra: I wonder how Jenny is getting on.
Strax: If she hasn’t made contact by nightfall, I suggest a massive frontal attack on the factory, Madam. Casualties can be kept to perhaps as little as eighty percent.
Madame Vastra: I think there might be subtler ways of proceeding, Strax.
Strax: Suit yourself.

The Doctor: Just when you think your favorite lock-picking Victorian chambermaid will never turn up. Jenny! (he kisses her, she slaps him) You have no idea how good that feels.

The Doctor: Ooh, I once spent helluva long time trying to get a gobby Australian to Heathrow Airport.
Clara: What for?
The Doctor: Search me.

Strax: Horse! You have failed in your mission! We are lost with no sign of Sweetville. Do you have any final words before your summary execution? (the horse snorts) The usual story! Fourth one this week… and I’m not even hungry.

The Doctor: Oh, great, great. Attack of the supermodels.

Madame Vastra: Strax, you’re overexcited. Have you been eating those jelly sherbet fancies again?
Strax: No...
Madame Vastra: Go outside and wait for me until I call for you.
Strax: But Madam...
Madame Vastra: Go!
Strax: I’m gonna go play with my grenades.

The Doctor: Ooh, The Repulsive Red Leech! Now on balance I think I prefer The Crimson Horror.

Clara: A chimney that doesn’t blow smoke.
The Doctor: Clever clocks.
Clara: Miss me?
The Doctor: Yeah, lots.

Mrs Gillyflower: Oh, ho ho ho. You do seem to keep turning up like a bad penny, young man.
The Doctor: Force of habit.

The Doctor: I’m the Doctor, you’re nuts, and I’m gonna stop you.
Mrs Gillyflower: I'm afraid Mr. Sweet and I cannot allow that.
The Doctor: Ah, yes. Would it be impolite to ask why you and Mr. Sweet are petrifying your workforce with diluted prehistoric leech venom?

The Doctor: Mrs. Gillyflower, you have no idea what you’re dealing with. In the wrong hands that venom could wipe out all life on this planet.
Mrs. Gillyflower: Do you know what these are? The wrong hands!

The Doctor: Hang on, hang on. I’ve got a sonic screwdriver.
Clara: Yeah? I’ve got a chair!
The Doctor: Yeah. That worked. 

The Doctor: You’re the boss.
Clara: Am I?
The Doctor: No. No, get in.

Clara: No, that’s just someone who looks like me.
Angie: And that’s someone who looks like your boyfriend.
Artie: Is he an alien?
Angie: Why would he be an alien?
Artie: The chin!
Angie: And the time travel?

19 February 2014

Quotes from "Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS"

Clara: You're not getting me to talk to your ship. It's probably bonkers.
The Doctor: It's okay, it's okay...
Clara: Arrgh, you're like one of those guys who can't go out with a girl unless his mother approves.
The Doctor: It's important to me you get along. I could leave you two alone together.
Clara: Now you're creeping me out.

Bram Van Baalen: How big is this baby?
The Doctor: Picture the biggest ship you've ever seen. Are you picturing it?
Bram Van Baalen: Yeah.
The Doctor: Good. Now forget it. Because this ship is infinite.

The Doctor: Don't get into a spaceship with a madman. Didn't anybody ever teach you that?

Clara: Why do you have zombie creatures? Good guys do not have zombie creatures! Rule one of storytelling.

Gregor Van Baalen: All right, all right, look. A deal's a deal, you got the girl back. Now cancel the self-destruct.
The Doctor: Ah. Ah. Ha. You know, I've got to tell you, I won't be needing you in my quiz team.
Gregor Van Baalen: What?
The Doctor: There is no self-destruct! Hey? Hey? Hey? Had you going there, boys, didn't I? I just wiggled a few buttons, yeah. The old "wiggly button" trick. And the face, you've got to do the face. "Save her or we all die." I thought I rushed it a bit, but...
Tricky: So you're telling us we're safe?
The Doctor: Ish. Apart from the monsters and the TARDIS reinventing the architecture every five minutes. 

The Doctor: Right. You lot wait here. I'll check and see if it's safe. We can only survive for a minute or two in there.
Clara: Umm, what happens if we stay longer?
The Doctor: Our cells would liquify and our skin will start to burn.
Clara: I always feel so good after we've spoken.
The Doctor: Marvelous. Keep this door shut.
Clara: That will not be a problem.

The Doctor: I need to know if you feel safe. I need to know you're not afraid.
Clara: Of?
The Doctor: The future. Running away with a spaceman in a box. Anything could happen to you.
Clara: That's what I'm counting on. Push the button.

12 February 2014

Quotes from "Hide"

The Doctor: I'm looking for a ghost.
Alec Palmer: And you are?
Clara: Ghostbusters.

The Doctor: I'm the Doctor.
Alec Palmer: Doctor what?
The Doctor: If you like.

The Doctor: Oh. Oh look. Oh lovely, the ACR 90821. Oh, bliss. Nice toggle switches. Ooh, I do love a toggle switch. Actually, I like the word "toggle." Huh. Nice noun, excellent verb.

Clara: Say we actually find her. What do we say?
The Doctor: We ask her how she came to be. Whatever she is?
Clara: Why?
The Doctor: Because I don't know. And ignorance is... umm, what's the opposite of bliss?
Clara: Carisle?
The Doctor: Yes. Yes, Carisle. Ignorance is Carisle.

The Doctor: Do you feel anything?
Clara: No.
The Doctor: Your pants are so on fire.

The Doctor: What do you think?
Clara: Uh, color's a bit boisterous.
The Doctor: I think it brings out my eyes.
Clara: Makes my eyes hurt.

Clara: I mean, one moment you're in 1974 looking for ghosts. But all you have to do is open your eyes and talk to whoever is standing there. To you I haven't been born yet. And to you I've been dead a hundred billion years. Is my body out there somewhere, in the ground?
The Doctor: Yes, I suppose it is.
Clara: But here we are, talking. So I am a ghost. To you, I'm a ghost. We're all ghosts to you. We must be nothing.
The Doctor: No, no. You're not that.
Clara: Then what are we? What can we possibly be?
The Doctor: You are the only mystery worth solving.

The Doctor: Listen, all I need to do is dive into another dimension, find the time traveller, help her escape the monster, get home before the entire dimension collapses, and Bob's your uncle.

05 February 2014

Quotes from "Cold War"

Clara: Are we going to be okay?
The Doctor: Oh, yes.
Clara: Is that a lie?
The Doctor: Possibly.

The Doctor: A native of the planet Mars. And we go way back. Way back.
Captain Zhukov: Martian, you can't be serious?
The Doctor: I'm always serious. With days off.

The Doctor: Skaldak won't talk to you. You're--you're an enemy soldier.
Captain Zhukov: And how would he know that?
The Doctor: A soldier knows another soldier. He'll smell it on you, smell it a mile off.
Captain Zhukov: And he wouldn't smell it on you, Doctor?

Clara: How'd I do? Was I okay?
The Doctor: This wasn't a test, Clara.
Clara: I know. But...
The Doctor: You were great, yeah.
Clara: Really?
The Doctor: Really.

The Doctor: Professor, I could kiss you.
Professor Grisenko: If you insist.
The Doctor: Later.

Skaldak: My world is dead! But now there will be a second Red Planet. Red with the blood of humanity.