Quotes from "The Caretaker" (Part 2)

The Doctor: Oh, listen, there's the bell, off you go. Haven't you got shoplifting to do?
Courtney Woods: I'm going to tell the Headmaster.
The Doctor: Oh, yes, well, fine. Cut along, you're running out of time.
Courtney Woods: For what?
The Doctor: Everything. Human beings have incredibly short life spans. Frankly, you should all be in a permanent state of panic. Tick tock, tick tock.
Courtney Woods: You're weird.
The Doctor: Yes, I am. What about you?
Courtney Woods: I'm a disruptive influence.
The Doctor: Good to meet you.
Courtney Woods: And you.
The Doctor: Now get lost.
Courtney Woods: Okay.

The Doctor: Now, I imagine you've many questions. Fire away, I won't answer any of them.

The Doctor: Why do I keep you around?
Clara: Because the alternative would be developing a conscience of your own.

Clara: You're invisible. Oh, my God, that's incredible!
The Doctor: Correct. I am invisible and I am incredible.

The Doctor: I'll see you tomorrow. We'll go somewhere nice. Ancient Egypt. Crocodilopolis. They worship a big crocodile there, so the name is a useful coincidence.

Danny: How stupid do you think I am?
The Doctor: I'm willing to put a number on it.

Danny: He's...your dad. Your space dad.
The Doctor: Oh...genius. That is really, really brilliant reasoning. How can you think I'm her dad when we both look exactly the same age?
Clara: We do not look the same age.
The Doctor: I was being kind.

Danny: One thing, Clara. I'm a soldier, guilty as charged. You see him? He's an officer.
The Doctor: I am not an officer!
Danny: I'm the one who carries you out of the fire. He's the one who lights it.
The Doctor: Out. Now.
Danny: Right away, sir? Straight now?
The Doctor: Yes.
Danny: Am I dismissed?
The Doctor: Yes, you are!
Danny: That's him. Look at him, right now. That's who he is.

Danny: You're using her like a decoy?
The Doctor: No, not like a decoy. As a decoy. Don't they teach you anything at stupid school?
Danny: Well, is there anything I can do?
The Doctor: Yes, yes, and this is very, very important. Leave us alone!