(as a dinosaur walks through London)
Inspector Gregson: Madame Vastra, thank God. I'll wager you've not seen anything like this before.
Madame Vastra: Well... not since I was a little girl.
Inspector Gregson: It's just laid an egg.
Madame Vastra: It dropped a blue box marked "Police" out of its mouth. Your grasp of biology troubles me.
Jenny: So it's him, then, the Doctor?
Madame Vastra: A giant dinosaur from the distant past has just vomited a blue box from outer space--this is not a day for jumping to conclusions.
The Doctor: Who invented this room?
Clara: Doctor, please, you have to lie down.
The Doctor: Doesn't make any sense, look, it's only got a bed there. Why is there only a bed in it?
Clara: Because it's a bedroom. It's for sleeping.
The Doctor: Okay, what do you do when you're awake?
Jenny: You leave the room.
The Doctor: So you've got a whole room for not being awake in. But what's the point, you're just missing the room? And don't look in that mirror. It's absolutely furious.
Madame Vastra: I'm having difficulty sleeping.
The Doctor: Oh? Oh, well, I--I wouldn't bother with that. I never bother with sleeping, I just do standy-up catnaps.
Madame Vastra: Oh, really? How interesting. And--and when do you do those?
The Doctor: Well, generally whenever anyone starts talking. I like to skip ahead to my bit, it saves time.
Madame Vastra: I love monkeys, they're so funny.
Jenny: Oh, I see. So people are monkeys now, are they?
Madame Vastra: No, dear. People are apes. Men are monkeys.
The Doctor: I am alone. The world which shook at my feet, and the trees, and the sky, have gone, and I am alone now. Alone.
Clara: Are you translating?
The Doctor: The wind bites now, and the world is grey, and I am alone here. Can't see me. Doesn't see me. Can't see me.
Clara: Who can't see it? I think all of London can see it.
Strax: May I take your coat?
Clara: Not wearing a coat.
Strax: What's all that?
Clara: Clothes.
Strax: May I take your clothes?
Clara: Probably not.
Strax: Are you wearing a hat?
Clara: It's hair!
Strax: Oh, I think it's a hat, would you like me to check?
Madame Vastra: But he is the Doctor. He has walked this universe for centuries untold. He has seen stars fall to dust. You might as well flirt with a mountain range.
Madame Vastra: Jenny and I are married, yet for appearance's sake, we maintain a pretense, in public, that she is my maid.
Jenny: Doesn't exactly explain why I'm pouring tea in private.
Madame Vastra: Hush now.
Jenny: Good pretense, isn't it?
Clara: The Doctor. What's he doing here?
Madame Vastra: There is trouble. Where else would he be?
The Doctor: No, no, shut up! What do you all have for brains--pudding? Look at you. Why can't I meet a decent species? Planet of the pudding-brains!
Clara: You got the TARDIS, then?
Strax: Military tactics. The Doctor is still missing, but he will always come looking for his box. By bringing it here, he will be lured from the dangers of London to this place of safety, and we will melt him with acid.
Clara: Okay, that last part?
Strax: And we will not melt him with acid. Old habits.
Jenny: Meanwhile, Madam Vastra is slightly occupied by the Conk-Singleton forgery case, and is having the Camberwell child-poisoner for dinner.
Clara: For dinner?
Jenny: After she's finished interrogating him. Probably best to stay out the larder. It'll get a bit noisy in there later.
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